Just In Time for Peace: Maxwell Hooper (Remnant)

[eunhathes]

Just In Time for Peace
The Journals of Maxwell Hooper[/b]

(c)2380 The Maxwell Hooper Estate
Published by FNN Print Sindicates

[eunhathes]

... [All of you who] think the Federation is a such a benevolant thing, let me tell you about this one time, while I was in the Maquis.

Every single Federation member seems to have an ugly picture painted of them, myself included. That is, until I joined them. I had signed up on a two year stint for the raider, Elara's Faithful. Well, then the Cardassians went and blew the ship to hell. I was one of the only survivors, picked up by the Unity's Vengeance. Fair piece of work, that ship. But, me, I was too wrapped up in the loss of my shipmates. Next thing I know, we're on Cestus III, and I'm drinking myself into a coma with a mix of 2350 Saurian brandy and 2358 Andorian ale. It tasted good and drowned out everyone's faces. I couldn't think. So, what do I do? I started bawling. Tears for Faithful, tears for the Killarney, tears for the whole, godforsaken universe.

Next thing I know, I got this young, cute thing sauntering up to me. I know her from the Vengeance, she's a Doctor. Doctor Kira Owens. Owe that woman my life, and maybe she could have it. That lovely little woman asked me if she could talk with me. Heavens, if I hadn't been drunk right then and there, she could've probably taken me home with her. I was to busy, again, obsessing over that fling in my life, Echo Quigney. She left me broken hearted, killed by Cardies. Couldn't quite seem to get her last, painful grimace out of my head that evening. I swear I must have seen her a million times that day.

Next thing I knew, there were bottles and fists flying. You couldn't go a meter without running smack into one of those Feddies in the Klisikar that evening. Well I, being liberated of mind that day, decided to talk to one of them. One thing led to another, and I got coldcocked over the head. I really don't remember much else but a blur of colors, lights, people, and Quigney. Or, maybe just Kira. Either way, I can't recall that much about. Let that be a lesson to the people who think that the Federation is full of 'do-gooders' and peace lovers. They can't even let a drunken man in a bar alone, they gotta go popping him over the head to get their kicks.

There was this other time, while on Qo'Nos when I hit a [Klingon in the eye with a pistachio.]...